He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
