I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
