I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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