are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
