Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
