You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
