This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
She bit a glass in half.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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