Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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