Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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