I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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