found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
