he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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