i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
