its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
