She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
