Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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