Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. đŚ
His name isnt in my phone as âSatanâs spawnâ for no reason. #devildick
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
