i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
