ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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