Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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