Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
