wakey wakey hands off snakey
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize