Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
