My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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