it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize