Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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