Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
