Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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