Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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