super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
