Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
