Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
