i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
