How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
