Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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