remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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