So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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