Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I cut my penus on the lid.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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