She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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