Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize