That's intense
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
