she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
