you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
