fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
