there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
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