even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Randomize