Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
