Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
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