Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
