Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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